Societal Grains


     Seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years, decades… If all goes as planned, we will have a lot of time on this planet before we become fertilizer.  Our time on this planet is spent experiencing and integrating with that which is all around us.  I live my life in a fashion that allows me the freedom of embracing experiences as they come and in high frequency at that.  In my life I have encountered and interacted with herbivores a few times and have always enjoyed the comestibles of their lifestyle.  As a lifelong meat-eater, I have decided to experiment with this alternate eating lifestyle.  I have been living for a week now without meat, eggs, cheese and dressings.  I have maintained a 3-meal day on only veggies, fruits, nuts, and breads.  You’re reading this so that means I haven’t fell down dead from it either.


     It hasn’t been completely easy but it hasn’t been impossible either.  There have been a time or 2 when my mind has thought “Dude, where the heck did the cheeseburgers go?”, but I have been able to keep it in check.  What I’ve noticed though is that in the beginning of this change, I was eating an enormous amount of food.  My plate would have an enormous salad on it and I would have no problem with chowing down to the bottom of it and pondering a second helping.  As this week has progressed, those serving sizes have progressively fallen naturally and I have inadvertently and accidentally solved an issue that I have been unable to resolve for as long I can remember and that is OVEREATING.  


     As the food continues to stay healthy and my portion size begins to lower, I have also found 30 minutes to 1 hour a day for physical activity.  From CrossFit beat-downs to past the point of just nausea (if you know where I am going with that), to strength training and cardio treadmill treks into no where, I have began to feel that life vitality I once had when I was doing CrossFit and eating perfect back in the day. 


     There truly is value to breaking through our mental and physical barriers on a path to betterment.  This reminds me a lot of that fog I spoke of in my last posting titled, Your Mountain.  As we explore and penetrate our internal limits, we find ourselves in a struggle to experience whatever is passed the fog.  It’s an eerie and thrilling sensation and I am curious to find out if it is in fact an addicting sensation.  What I am finding is that my willpower is increasing with each successful climb through the fog.  What many may call hard-headed is actually willpower.  

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     Recently, I encountered a situation where someone thought of me and hooked me up with a Subway sub when he thought I might not be able to make it to lunch due to current circumstances.  I was in a perplexing situation because the sub looked delicious.  It was a steak and cheese sub and smelled especially well when it was presented to me.  It took nerve, willpower, and some strength to graciously thank my friend but also to apologize for I had to decline his grateful gesture.  I explained that I am currently battling some internal conflicts that have grown within me and the food I eat.  Luckily, that’s as far as it had to go but when I did head towards the dining hall, I realized how much of an important moment that was.  I pushed away something I never would have in the past while, also not letting excuses like “it would be rude to say no to this gift” allow me to tell myself that it’s okay to break protocol just this 1 time.

     Breaking our mental limits makes us stronger and stronger the more limits we break and we really begin to realize just how much control we wield in this 1 lifetime we hold.  You can honestly do anything you want in life and you can say no even when cultural standards would force you to say yes.  It’s okay to go against the grain of societal norms when it’s your happiness that is on the line.  It’s not greed, hard-headedness, or derogatory in any way, despite what another may say to you.  Your happiness is more important than the situation ever is.  I believe I am going to continue on with this experiment and see how I feel about it as time progresses but so far, I AM HAPPY.

Have a fantastic day!



Your Mountain

10409348_1514830135405614_3588031057745651421_n       Inch by inch we claw our way to a place where we didn’t think we could get to before we began to start the journey. For what looks so daunting and impossible from afar, slowly begins to become a reality. You will not believe you can accomplish something large until you begin to work for it. The why’s and what’s and what if’s fog the image of success before you ever begin to strive towards it. You are bogged.


As your eyes peer slowly up the mountain that lies before you, you see that you could simply never begin and think about how easy it would be to choose to stay here. This is reality and you are not alone at the bottom of that hole. You are actually surrounded, engulfed, constricted, and being strangled by those who continue to wallow in doubt, despair, excuse, and drug-induced faux realities. But while you stand at the bottom of that hole and look up, you will see a small hazy glimmer of light that fights through the fog. There’s a choice awaiting you and no matter what, you will make a decision. YOU CAN CHOOSE TO STOP or YOU CAN CHOOSE WORK TOWARDS IT.



     When you begin to work for it, you feel excited but quickly after that excitement fades, you will find yourself alone in your mission. As you climb this mountain before you, you feel the bottom dwellers reaching out towards you and begging you to return for they’re scared of loneliness at the bottom, as much as you are now scared of the loneliness as you attempt to climb. You make it up a decent portion despite your fears and their yells of discontent. You hit a jutting out ceiling; an impossible ledge to reach out to. You stop and feel the weight of your current work that has not been acknowledged yet. You look down and can hear the shouts of the familiar pack calling for you to return. You can smell the familiar stench as it begins to surround you. YOU LOOK UP; an impossible wall without a clear view of what is on the other side. YOU HAVE ENCOUNTERED ANOTHER INEVITABLE CHOICE. Is your motivation too weak to close out uncertainty? Is your loneliness to strong and begging for the attention of the familiar? You are at a precipice where many have stood. This is where a dream truly begins to take form.



     You stop looking down and lock your eyes on the wall. The realization that you do not have a choice any longer begins to consume your every cell. THERE IS NO CHOICE. You can only keep going up. YOU LEAP! Your now fragile and brittle fingertips gain traction on the wall’s lip and you feel LIFE for the very first time and it feels curiously sweet. BUT ONLY FOR A SECOND… You begin to lose traction and you feel fear. You feel that you have made a mistake… YOU QUICKLY MAKE A CHOICE… “NO!”, you shout. You are not sure what happens as your brain flashes an instant of pure cognitive bliss and you harness unknown muscle strength to pull your body to your failing hands. The traction seems to hold even though you feel it to be impossible. You swing a foot over and gain a lock. You have hit a hidden perfection. You look downward and hear nothing any longer. The pack below stares quietly at you. Their hands are lowered and their gaze is longing as if they have seen something impossible. You have made it. They stare into the impossible as you once did before you left. They stare up as you turn your head around and complete your vault over into the unknown. YOU STAND and look at your footing on a floor you have never seen before. There’s disbelief and fear mixed with rewarding somber and wonderment. Slowly your eyes climb up the continuous rock before you. The climb is not done. But this time, something has changed in you. You begin to see all the little steps it will take to obtain your goal and you realize that the goal was not daunting or impossible at all. You feel the presence of person and you look up to see an arm stretched out.


     You have never seen this person before. A person that has faded from existence below. A man only known by legend and by want. A man no person on the bottom of the hole believes came from the hole. A man that seems to have been born above the hole. THIS IS WRONG. This is a man who has felt everything you felt before the climb and everything you have felt after your climb. The man is smiling and reaches out for you. You smile back and reach out and feel the embrace of continuous positivity. You climb to his level and he nods for you to press on. He eggs you on with a glance. You both know that there is no choice anymore. The path is before you and you both begin to press on together, talking, living, and enjoying the company. You see clarity above… THE FOG HAS LIFTED? NO!!!! You have lifted… above the fog. As you look down, you no longer see the hole bottom. You can hear a murmur of the crowd below but no actual words stick out as if it is the gathering of a stadium’s noise. A background noise… the reward for your difficult CHOICE. As you press on, you realize that you were tested, sure. You were required to forge ahead but were you actually required? NO! You were not… You CHOSE to feel that way and required yourself to press on because you were motivated enough to choose to succeed in your passion. This is how we all accomplish that which seems impossible and it all starts with that thing, CHOICE. Are you ready to choose?  


If you have made it this far, I want you take a deep look on the people who surround you. Your friends, family, and acquaintances, your coworkers, and your girlfriends… Are they reaching out to you from above, or grasping you from eye level? Are your dreams elsewhere and do you feel discontent? You are at the bottom of a hole and your dreams are somewhere above you, through the fog of your own disbelief. It’s a lonely trek towards them for a point, but as you undress the fears and familiarity of what is comfortable feeling now, you will find comfort further ahead by those who understand what you have gone through since they have as well. THERE ARE HIGHER BEINGS in this world. There are those who see the light because they have fought out of their fog. This is bliss and this is true happiness. Are you ready to make the choice you have been afraid to make for your entire life? Are you ready to find yourself? IF SO, WE WILL BE WAITING FOR YOU WITH AN OUTSTRETCHED ARMS SOMEWHERE ABOVE.10341411_1515067035381924_3748430197184438148_n